A Father's Intuition

I awoke early on Sunday morning, headed to the bathroom...Hubby wakes up, comes into the bathroom."We'll Honey," he said,  as I sat on the toilet.  He's holding a CVS bag filled with fertility, ovulation and maternity test...prompting me, "they had a sale so I picked up a few."  It's too early to argue...but I thought to myself- what man happens get caught up in a sale on the women's fertility testing isle?  Without any hesitation,  I bantered, "Do you expect to PASS or FAIL."

We've been here before, so historically - the test is a matter of announcing to me rather than confirming to him.

I think to myself,  May 20st was my drop date, three days late...Could it be?

I position myself comfortably seated, awaiting the results..."We'll?"


I know the look, "Come On, Are we pregnant?"  He shows me the test, "There's suppose to be two lines." He said, as he handed me the applicator...


Nothing out of the ordinary...however he's pretty confident that they'll be a new addition to the Bercier Family some time next year...


Call it a Father's intuition...To be continued...

A Mother's Cry

"Lord, help me to accept my own limitations," revised from original written May 6, 2010

Lord, I thank you for every seed you've given me. It was your doing, because only You are the giver of life. You miraculously developed them while they were hidden inside the womb. Tucked away in the folds of what seemingly appeared to be the gain of my own flesh. I know that I am simply your willing vessel to bear, love and train them to be what you designed them to be. It's overwhelming to consider these delicate souls must be introduced to the very one responsible for their existence. Yes, I've been gifted to be called "Mother," but graced to be called a virtuous daughter of the Most High God.

I thank you for this charge - the burden which brings pain and discomfort yet also, exceeding joy. Help me not to take my mission for granted, that I not abort Your plan to discover my own. Father sever the ties that confine me and hinder me from excelling in every area that you have ordained. Dispel every myth and lie that society conveys and teach me how to instruct with loving kindness, grace, mercy, patience and long suffering.

Your children need Your touch, and Your words are bread to them. Your hand has provided for me, when all I desired was to be forgiven- covered and protected, give me these things so that I can then do the same for your children-- these you have set in my care until the appointed time when you shall call them by name.

Remind me of your order daily so that when I stumble, I never stray from your plan. Lord it is You who has grounded me and given me a content heart. Help me to not seek my children to return what you've already supplied. Continue to strengthen our home to be Christ-focus and not our personal tabernacle.

These children are your heritage. I need you, Holy Spirit to guide me, use my hands to shape and mold their conscience so that they fear and reverence you. I am grateful that you see fit for them to discover their godly parentage early for you said those that seek you early shall find you. Lord help me to see them as you do so that I am careful not to curse them with my mouth.

I cancel every evil word that I have spoken in spirit, written or verbalized that would cause harm or abuse to your children. Lord sever any ungodly expectation, practice or unfruitful ritual that I and my husband have adopted and replace it with Your standard. I cast down every vain imagination, motherly pride and self righteousness and give You all the Praise and Glory for the rewards of having obedient children with undisturbed composure. I thank you for wiping away the bitterness of my failed attempts of mothering out of my flesh and given me the sweetness of being perched beneath your wings as I labor in love.

Help me to accept my own limitation, idiosyncrasies and weaknesses and trust that you will be the God- from their mother's womb. Thank you that we have no lack- for you are our unlimited resource and will always provide for us all, our sons and daughters and generations to come.

You have been ever faithful and just to supply all of their needs according to your riches and glory. I thank you Lord that you have given me a mother that far exceeds others and I trust that you will minister to her heart, even now. Allow her to trust you as you instruct her on how to be that God-fearing mother who demonstrates your statues to me and my siblings. You never cease to provide me with support through her wisdom and guidance as she supports us in raising your children.

Father, I give thanks to YOU for without YOU I could not succeed in parenting. I know private success with you is worth more that public success in the world at the expense of private failure as a mother. So this Mother's Day my desire is that You delight yourself in me, that I may be a living demonstration of diligence guided with Your faithfulness.

In Jesus' Name, Amen.

-a servant's heart

Disclaimer. A servant's utterance is copyright protected (c) 2011 a servant's heart and the information contained expresses personal views and values of a servant’s heart. The passage in its entirely may be forwarded or linked without consequence however, for any non-personal excerpt for print or publication should request consent from a servant's heart prior to use.

Diligence

Hebrews 6:1-12 NIV

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1Therefore let us leave the elementary teachings about Christ and go on to maturity, not laying again the foundation of repentance from acts that lead to death,^a and of faith in God, 2 instruction about baptisms, the laying on of hands, the resurrection of the dead, and eternal judgment. 3 And God permitting, we will do so.

4It is impossible for those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, who have shared in the Holy Spirit, 5 who have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the coming age, 6 if they fall away, to be brought back to repentance, because^b to their loss they are crucifying the Son of God all over again and subjecting him to public disgrace.

7Land that drinks in the rain often falling on it and that produces a crop useful to those for whom it is farmed receives the blessing of God. 8But land that produces thorns and thistles is worthless and is in danger of being cursed. In the end it will be burned.

9Even though we speak like this, dear friends, we are confident of better things in your case—things that accompany salvation. 10God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them. 11We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, in order to make your hope sure. 12We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.

A Sister's Plea

My heart is heavy and my eyes overflowing with tears so much deception going on with us. I want to share my heart's cry to my fellow sisters. Women of God, I pray against the spirit of offense and I pray that you will join the movement to choose life and reclaim our families for the building of the Kingdom. I pray that the Lord begins with me first. All too long we have contributed to the failing of our society. Turn us back, oh Lord, I cry, Amen.


So many sisters are basking in lies instead of the Glory of God. Trusting in institutions that undermine the fabric of our homes, our marriages are under attack as we suffer from friendly fire within the walls of our very own homes. We have allowed the enemy to use us as weapons of mass destruction, Not you? Well perhaps the sister next to you…We continue to accept the pop culture’s constant redefining of the family structure even though it is contrary to the Bible. Not me? You say…I’m speaking to women as a whole. Yes, today Women of God are returning these thoughts, mind-sets and strongholds back to the fiery pit of hell, but our fellow sisters are still sleeping.


The progressive movement told women to despise our God-given role to function as a wife and mother, the first calling. God designed the woman as the help-meet. Since the Garden, we've progressively longed to be equal to man. When God put the woman under the subjection of her husband, after the fall in Eden, it became the defining moment of a long term battle between the sexes.

God said. "Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you Genesis 3:16

Woman's longing to be equal with man has caused us to devalue our worth and abandoned our post. Once women were referred to as wives, by identification of their role or function, today the word woman, has become a role in itself. Touting power and prestige , ‘a powerful woman -a successful woman or a business woman.’ It is the enemy that sold women on the idea that our success was based on personal achievement instead of personal sacrifice. We’ve decided that pleasing God is an option so long as it doesn’t interfere with our goals and personal objectives.

Since the Women's Liberation movement of the late 1960's, the home has suffered for the pursuit of women finding fulfillment and purpose outside of God's design. We have traded our god-defined role for social and economic parity. So we toast to vocational training, education and workforce empowerment at the expense of mal-nurtured children and unbalanced households. We opt for formula instead of nursing our children so we can move up the corporate ladder. Today we continue to pat each other on the back to congratulate one another on how well we balance motherhood and the workplace. We are commitment phobic because we don’t want to give the impression we need a man. When in all truth, we are afraid he’ll actually need us. Wasn't it God that said it wasn't good for man to be alone? Women our men need us...We need them, whether you like it or not. And our children need us both...This interdependent relationship works, it's the way God intended us to prosper. Our idea of marrying has become a strategic alliance necessary if it pushes us closer to obtaining our own dreams. Our children have become a nuisance so we vow to take personal responsibility and swear by birth control. When we get caught slipping we take a prescription of a single dose and take a few personal days. The married, long for the days they could do what they want to do, while the single take pleasure in making our lives appear to one to be envied. We resent our roles in the home yet act as the office spouse of our bosses.

Raising our daughters to pursue her personal interests is a way of negating the guilt from our own pursuit of dreams, the price of neglecting her when she needed us the most. The statistics show our success is contrary to the purposes God intended for us. Why aren't we willing to be honest and admit the reward has been far more costly?

We have outsourced the managing of our homes to hired helpers. We devalued the significance of a two-parent home to praise single-parenting. Our new method of co-parenting exchanges the father of our children for partnerships with aging parents, daycare, schools, local church affiliations, and community leagues and teams. We allow government, laws and anti-Christ philosophies to dictate our lifestyles. Our children are raised to seek knowledge without the wisdom of God. We excuse our poor parenting by blaming our parents, yet never choose to take personal responsibility of charting the course of the new generation. Our sons have no identity. They are misguided into assuming a visual representation of what a man is and lack understanding of their God given authority. We have imprisoned the man-child in our world, subjecting them to our dysfunctional mindset of their role as our sons. They never transition from son to man.

Now there is an even greater move in our society that I'm convinced will further deplete the value of our young girls. Girl power- girls rock is sweeping the nation- never in the entire Bible has pride been a good thing for anyone yet we are teaching girls to be PROUD. We should be grooming our daughters with understanding of why they were created in the first place. Our identity and pride should be in Christ alone. Teaching these girls that God has reserved us and called us with a holy calling should be our mission. When we point them to God, He in turn will reveal to them who they are and the purpose He created them for. Our daughters need to understand there is a clearly distinctive plan God intended for us to fulfill. Society wants us to be acknowledged for our ability to perform on equal level with man; instead we should embrace our role to function differently to accomplish what our counter-part could not. Women we have to fulfill our God-given assignment of the tending to our homes first. We are uniquely graced to answer the call that man could not fulfill. How can we instill these biblical truths when we ourselves have believed the lie.

Women we must get back to our call. Our men desperately need us on our post. Our children need us to nurture, teach and point them toward our Savior. We are the home builders, we've been out to battle on the front lines fighting in a war that we were never intended to. While we’ve allowed the enemy to lure us away from the home, our families are being ravaged and we are suffering casualties at a staggering rate. It's time to reclaim our identity and turn our homes back to God. We have been comforted by false security, girl power, desiring position, recognition, fame and fortune and all the treasures of this world with little regard for life itself.

Murder and strife is in our own homes instead of love and compassion. Our appetites continue to increase power and drama and chaos over truth. So many gainfully seeking after God's best, yet doing evil. Our hearts are filled with hatred for one another and we despise those who are blessed by God. We covet the gifts and anointing and want good measure but never seek the character of Christ. We go the church seeking a good report, a personal prophesy, and call them faith building calisthenics, yet won't bring an offering of praise.

We've grown accustomed to accepting every form of addiction. We trade our peace for trinkets and depreciating liabilities. Our lives destitute yet we are comforted by covering our head with masks. Hiding behind a well-kept body with a sin-sick soul believing that no one sees us, while thumbing our noses up to God. The women must wake up. There are souls at the crossroads. We are preaching success and prosperity yet all we eat is the spoils of our labor. Distant husbands, uncommitted lovers and estranged rebellious children. Our fruit is spoiling on the vine because we won't move our feet at His word. No repentance, no acknowledgment of correction. Where is our harvest? The harvest that is being reaped full of thistles and thorns because we have sown in barren land. We look so much like the world that when the world comes to us, they find us needier than themselves.

We commit murder, offering up our unborn as sacrifices to be slaughtered on the abortion table. We refrain from marrying and we despise authority of any kind. We are rebels and thrive in organizations that constantly praise us for our dead works. We've become the daughters of anarchy. We pray God bless the sinner each day as if God is hearing us and curse our siblings, children, spouses and parents. We expect our children to be blessed yet they don't honor us as the Bible teaches. We love to hate the sin in others but claim ours as simple personality traits to be accepted by those around us. Children are dying in the streets, and at the hand of their very own parents. We abuse and curse them with our mouths because we have been lied to. We are mistrusting because we are untrustworthy. So how can we trust God. Our faith is suffering. We are full of unforgiveness when the truth is no one has done us more damage than ourselves. We constantly make promises to ourselves and break them time and time again. We don't trust ourselves because we've become masters at telling lies.

We can't accept love because we haven't accepted God's unconditional love. So now women are walking away from our families emotionally and some of us abandon them physically. Child support has become the mitigating punishment for both parents. Mother's raising their egos while Dad's disconnected from the seed of his lust. The elder women are old fools going round the mountain. Where are the wise, god-fearing teachers? We quote men instead of the word of God. We expect moral conduct to be modeled to our children by athletes, celebrities, clergy and businessmen and women. We say we don't acknowledge gender, race or sexual preference as we claim allegiance to the very system that is responsible for our plight. We have rejected our god- ordained roles to identify with animalistic tendencies.


This should not be so...It's time to REPENT.

It's time to wake up, women. Christ is coming back again. Let's get our hearts right. Pray before its too late.

Turn us back, oh God....Turn our hearts back to YOU. We should refrain from ungodly commitments, desire covenant marriages and establish a godly heritage for the Lord. Our offering to bring our gifts and talent to the building up of our marriages, households and ministries. Ask the Lord to settle in us His desires to pursue His purposes that bring us true fulfillment. Give sacrificially with a cheerful attitude and be willing to crucify unbridled appetites for things that steal us away from our god-intended purpose.

-a servant's heart

Disclaimer. A servant's utterance is copyright protected (c) 2011 a servant's heart and the information contained expresses personal views and values of a servant’s heart. The passage in its entirely may be forwarded or linked without consequence however, for any non-personal excerpt for print or publication should request consent from a servant's heart prior to use.

This is what the Lord says about this people:“They greatly love to wander;they do not restrain their feet. So the Lord does not accept them;he will now remember their wickedness and punish them for their sins.” Then the Lord said to me, “Do not pray for the well-being of this people. Although they fast, I will not listen to their cry; though they offer burnt offerings and grain offerings, I will not accept them. Instead, I will destroy them with the sword, famine and plague.” But I said, “Ah, Sovereign Lord, the prophets keep telling them, ‘You will not see the sword or suffer famine. Indeed, I will give you lasting peace in this place. Then the Lord said to me, “The prophets are prophesying lies in my name. I have not sent them or appointed them or spoken to them. They are prophesying to you false visions, divinations, idolatries and the delusions of their own minds. Jeremiah 14:10-14

Kingdom

In my journey, I have struggled with the disconnection between my personal experience of accepting salvation as a child and accepting Jesus as the Lord over my life today. Many questioning their salvation have brought them to a place of surrender, to be transformed by accepting Christ all over again. Doing it His way,In 2005, I did just that. Today I am walking out my salvation with understanding that my life is no longer my own. This isn't news to those who understand the Gospel of Jesus, but far too long we have misunderstood Salvation. Which is indeed a mystery, but I found comfort through understanding after seeking God. I once believed, Salvation, was simply a trade- a sinner’s death to receive eternal life. It is this belief that undermines the work completed at the cross. In actuality, Salvation is the recompense for offering your life as a testament to God. In order to accomplish a truly converted spirit, we must begin by denying ourselves, forsaking the world and totally surrendering to God’s way.

I believed in God as a child, yet I didn't accept Him as my God. Many have accepted that God exists as some Be-ing that exists far away from us. As a Christ-believer, I never learned what my requirement was, only that Christ had provided me with the eternal gift of life, a gift that I was afforded by the persecution of Jesus. Somehow I see this as a set up for failure for a new believer.

Why do we feel that our job is simply to preach Christ and convince the sinner to accept God's love and His Son? Is our Salvation without any consequence or obligation to this Almighty God? Yes, God gives us a free will to accept Him or deny Him. Many of us love the idea of Salvation but never desire to become slaves. Can you accept Salvation without be subjected to Christ? And yet say the Sinner’s Prayer, accept Jesus and go along living our lives, pursuing our dreams and aspirations with no obligation to God. The folly is after we've indulged in the pleasures of this world we eventually get old but we are comforted by thoughts of the pending gift, we accepted as insurance after death. For sure there will be a glorious white robe and crown awaiting us. We'll walk on the golden path that leads to the pearly gates of Heaven, and there God will be waiting to receive us. This is a grave illusion that many of us share.

Where did we go wrong? As the blows of life come against us we begin to resent this God who promised us love and fulfillment. We begin to despise Him and before long some of us forfeit our salvation for the comfort of this world. Our lives begin to reflect the god-hate relationship of the world. We begin to see God as the oppressor. How could Christians rebel against God’s word? First, we cut off our praise, we refuse to read the Bible, before long we’ve become stiff necked, pompous. Do you know any Christians that cry, “Lord, Lord,” yet delight in abominable relationships, wicked deeds and sinful pleasures? In history the disobedience of a slave would cause him to suffer great affliction. Sometimes this penalty could even mean death. It's time to re-evaluate our lives, and will to give up our lives so that God's kingdom comes into our own hearts. Now you might know some who say, they have accepted Christ but you can see it is evident that they have not given their life to Christ. You’ll know because their lives tell the story of not one who died to sin, but still are very much alive to committing sin. Living out the will of God is accepting His son. It’s easy to see the sin in another isn’t it. Start today by giving your life to Christ. This is where salvation begins.

We must first believe in God. Once we are graced to see ourselves as God sees us; wicked, filthy rags, void of understanding and undeserving of a relationship with Him. We must acknowledge that our hearts are bent toward evil and our thoughts are continually focused on mischief. Then and only then can we appreciate Jesus and His sacrifice to reconcile us to this Almighty God. Our appreciation for God's provision -Jesus- allows us to accept His love and His will. The acceptance of our sinful conditions and the salvation Christ offers leads to true transformation in the lives of those whose hearts thirst for righteousness.

The reality is when God reveals himself to you...you will never be the same. Once you truly receive His love you are transformed. Willingly, the life of a servant becomes simple.


In the Bible, God tells us that only Christ could satisfy the debt of sin. Why, if Christ paid the price for our sin do we feel there is no obligation to Him? The gospel according to Paul, teaches, we become the bond servant. This means SLAVE. Can you name a time in any culture where a slave can go about their day without being subjected to the will, instruction and direction his or her master? Yet, we go about our lives having accepted this matchless gift, but never offering our lives up to God. I'm convinced that this is evidence that the church is not having genuine conversions. The God of Israel never reigns over the trellises of our heart.

So why do so many claim to be Christians?

Many of us are merely touting the rhetoric of a faith in a God that we never serve.

Satan is known a legalist, he understands God's word and is crafty to deceive us. I am convinced that in the church, Satan has established his beliefs and continues to propagate lies and convince many they will inherit the kingdom of God. God's kingdom is not present in the reflection of our lives thus, we are no better than the heathen, because just as the heathen we continue to live like we don’t believe in the God of the Bible. As I study scripture, it points to the fact that, the demons believe in God. At that thought, to believe is not merely enough. Yes, we must believe in order to receive salvation, but it doesn't stop here. When we pray the Lord's Prayer we pray "thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven. Our Bible teaches us that we are the temple of God, if that be so- why are our lives not reflecting His kingdom? Satan threatened God that he would set His throne above God's. And so today we see Satan's kingdom influencing our lives, views and our faith. If God's kingdom is to come, Jesus must first reign over our lives. By doing so, we must allow Christ to establish God's kingdom in our hearts.

When we examine our lives...

Many refer to Christians as believers. Demons believe in God, they also fear Him, yet they continue to serve Satan, their master. Then, perhaps to believe is not enough to receive salvation. If you know you are living a life that screams [hate] to God, living contrary to God's ways just might be a signal that your soul is in grave danger. Ask God to reveal to you the sin in your life. If we earnestly desire to give up the comfort of deceit in exchange to becoming a living sacrifice, we must repent and ask God to cleanse us and seek His hand to be ruler over our lives. There is nothing more beautiful than to see a true converted sinner. What a testimony to see God’s workmanship displayed in each other’s lives. When God truly reign in our lives they reflect the manifestation of love of God. God’s children possess wisdom and they will walk in the gifts of the spirit. They exemplify the character of God and they provide the sinners with a vision of uncompromising conviction of God's hatred for sin. They reveal the essence of God's preservation in our lives.


My husband recently purchased, Radical by David Platt, which is subtitled, Taking Back Your Faith from the American Dream. The author forces us to take a look at the gospel of Jesus in comparison to the 21st Century Church. I am currently on disc 2 and it includes many of the things I mentioned here that challenges our lifestyles in contrast to Jesus' ministry. I believe the lukewarm lifestyle can very well be contributed to the lack of accepting Christ, which is the foundation of a true conversion, salvation. Platt points out that we must be willing to abandon the 21st Christian worldview if we intend to be effective in soul winning. Today, we are offering salvation to the masses yet after the many alter calls, people walk away and return to their sinful lives unchanged. He questions, whether we are ready for a RADICAL change. I agree, it’s time for RADICAL change of hearts, minds, spirits, thoughts, and prayers. A total transformation is needed in the lives of the self-professed Christian. This book provokes me to take a real look at Jesus' Ministry and how it contradicts the New Millennium believer's thoughts, actions and lifestyles. I warn you...this book will shake the foundations of many...It's time to WAKE UP...there are REAL battles to be fought. Souls are hanging in the balance and many are right in the church.

David Platt, author of RADICAL, implores us that there is a COST, so unless you are ready to ABANDON your mindset, the ones that have framed your faith and experience with God, there can be no progress. I think it is a must read for all Christians. Are we really having genuine conversions? WHY Do we HATE God, His Ways, His plan? This is about exchanging Christian worldviews- for Christ. Many are called - few are chosen.. I can't get these thoughts out of my head..."My fear, is that I will hear Jesus and yet still do what others did, walk away from His counsel." It's a must read for those who are fed up with the debauchery that we find ourselves accepting. Let's get back to Loving God-His way! To get it on audiobook, see the title link below.


Radical...by David Platt

May the revelation of acquiring a new perspective of unhealthy mindsets and lifestyle of the lukewarm believer motivate those who are grounded in truth to flourish in Christ and reclaim the lives of those seeking to submit to Christ in every area of their lives.

-a servant's heart

Disclaimer. A servant's utterance is copyright protected (c) 2011 a servant's heart and the information contained expresses personal views and values of a servant’s heart. The passage in its entirely may be forwarded or linked without consequence however, for any non-personal excerpt for print or publication should request consent from a servant's heart prior to use.

Death Grip

In 2001 at the age of 24, I became a first time home buyer, courtesy of Fannie Mae. Now today at the age of 34, I am proud to declare, I have become a homeowner, courtesy of Christ Jesus. I, like many others became paralyzed by debt. In 2009, the remaining balance on my mortgage was $130,000 and today, it is paid in full. I am a witness that Jesus saves and is a mighty deliverer. We made a decision not to allow the death-grip entangle us and our future generations. Make a commitment to follow God's way and retain your peace, health and prosperity. Christ set me free and I am free indeed.

Let me start my saying I believe that “Debt is Demonic” as spoken by Nasir Siddiki of Winning with Wisdom Ministries. If you aren’t paying cash for your car and home you are entrapped by a vicious cycle that is meant to give you one option… to lose. Living on a cash basis is contradictory to the common trend. God offers us a plan that we can count on. His way is always higher than ours. No wonder why many are adopting the Get-out-of-Debt mindset, as if it was ever a good idea not to be out of debt? God's way works. When we choose to borrow we are choosing bondage. There are benefits to borrowing but in most cases they don’t apply to everyday people. I learned that God’s way will lead to long term prosperity and if you don’t apply the biblical teachings to your life, sooner or later, you’ll wish you had. The credit system is designed for us to lose, but with God we can win. I’ve learned wisdom that is uncommon to the world, by accepting biblical teachings for marriage, business and finances. I dare you to make a decision and say “Let’s do it God’s way.” Here’s my part of my personal testimony of escaping the death grip.

I don't quite remember just how I felt as I signed those papers in the attorney's office that day. But I do remember feeling satisfied that our hard work had finally paid off. After months of negotiating with creditors and settling bad debts, my husband and I had finally escaped the hurt and shame of our past. We both had brought into our relationship, debt from our divorces, attorney fees from custody battles and student loan debt. Then on April 25, 2001 we now had realized the joy of success after divorce, or so we thought. To commemorate our new beginning, we now had our very own slice of the American pie. Accepting the keys to a modest 4 bed 2 1/2 traditional brick ranch soon became bittersweet. On one hand, I had accomplished conquering the financial debt and disgrace my divorce. On the other, now electing to bring a 30 year financial commitment into a new marriage could have proven catastrophic, since the most common cause of divorce is due to finances. Nevertheless, the purchase of a home was a sign of success by modern day standards.

Replacing our short lived debt free marriage with a 30 year mortgage eventually brought with it a whole new set of stress to our marriage. Now living in a quiet mostly retired community in the suburbs of Atlanta we decided to reposition ourselves for our dream of becoming independently wealthy. We read books on investing, starting businesses, and networking. We went to seminars, workshops and multi-level marketing campaigns to find out how the rich got rich. We read books such as "The Millionaire’s Mind" by Thomas J. Stanley, and "Rich Dad Poor Dad" by Robert Kiyosaki. In all of the books we learned that great success usually came after great failures. The central theme was to be willing to take risks and create asset generating vehicles, while strategically choosing options to protect your capital. We knew that for us to maximize true financial security we'd have to begin by paying off the house.

I can recall the day I checked the principle balance after remitting my first mortgage payment. To my regret, our 8% interest rate meant only $36 of the payment actually went to the principle. I felt betrayed under the weight of the reality. Buying a home definitely caused us to rethink our plan. Soon, becoming a borrower in hopes of becoming a homeowner someday, somehow didn't feel like much of a blessing. I begin to reminisce on the days when rent was $750 and I we were cash rich. "Renting wasn't all that bad," I remember thinking to myself.

I set up a meeting with my husband and immediately we put a plan in action to meet this challenge head on. I created a spreadsheet to calculate our progress and make sure that every payment was properly credited so the bank wouldn't get a penny more than they should. My anger motivated me. When others would give accolades at our ability to be homeowners I would make it my business to offer them the stark reality. Oftentimes, people would be offended by the mere thought that I wasn't ranting and boasting over our accomplishment. After sharing my sentiment with a close friend. She told me her plans of purchasing a new home, it was then I decided to resign my position after being met with some very harsh criticism. I honestly felt the responsibility to share with people the truth about the Truth-in-Lending Statement. Naturally this led me to become a Real Estate Agent.

The first year we paid down our mortgage enough to qualify for a refinance at no cost. So we refinanced and continued to pay the original monthly payment to further drive the mortgage down which was now at a 5.5% interest rate.

With the new income coming in from the Real Estate business we got caught up with the housing investment market. We purchased a property and when we found out we were expecting another baby decided to use it as a daycare. Between my husband and I climbing the corporate ladder, becoming speculative investors and the lustrous social lifestyle in Atlanta, it wasn't long before we had abandoned our plan. We went on a constant binge of upgrades using our newly established credit to foot the bill. Don't get me wrong we were rolling in the cash, but at some point our outgo was on the brink of exceeding our intake. And as I heard Pastor John Hagee put it.”this will eventually become your down fall."

Our financial health and lifestyle choices eventually led to the discovery of a larger problem. While on the quest of financial independence, we adopted the mindset of the heathen. Live, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die. Our growing lust for worldly pleasures and achievement came at a cost we hadn't considered. Soon our marriage was on the rocks. I remember calling out to God, I plead to Him and he brought salvation to our home. We recommitted our lives to Christ and vowed that He would be the head of our family.


After awakening to the sobering reality of all we bargained for, debt commitments, private schools, designer wardrobes, shoes, shoes and more shoes, real estate renovations, payroll, and luxury vehicles all compounded with increasing interest rates and loss of rental income, we received bad news. We would be losing one of our contracts. The onset of a pending catastrophe was thwarted by the hand of God.

I'm writing today to let you know that no matter what you face, face it with God. God enabled us to surmount tremendous difficulties. When I look back over my mistakes, nothing compares to the mistake of counting God out of the equations. He is the one who makes all things possible. In my folly I learned valuable lesson and have obtained wisdom and understanding. I thank God that when my heart was ready the Lord spoke to me in 2008. He said, "I will open up my treasury for you." I repented for following the ways of the world when indeed I had known better, because I knew how God felt about debt. It was God who placed the desired to be debt free in my husband’s heart many years before. My husband and I made God our top priority and in turn God revealed the plan for us to get out of debt. God wouldn't allow us to file bankruptcy. But we did return what we could lawfully. We sold our real estate, put our children in public schools and disciplined ourselves for freedom. I will tell you that not everything He commanded was understood but we did what He said. God proved to be faithful and merciful to us when we couldn’t understand His kindness. We saw so many falls along the way. Lost everything, but God committed His hand to us when we were the least deserving.

In October 2009, I heard about Nasir Siddiki's ministry Winning with Wisdom, from Tulsa, Oklahoma. I was moved by his testimony of how he paid his mortgage off in three years. I saw my family now see God stay the hand of the enemy by going into covenant with Him. When Siddiki referred to a mortgage as the "Death Grip," chills went down my spine.

After 2 years it became clear that the Lord was doing all that He said He would do. We’ve experienced Jehovah-Gmolah the God of recompense, Jehovah-Tsidkenu, the Lord of our Righteousness and Jehovah-Jireh, our great provider.

His treasure was indeed opened to us. God's treasure is without limit. His riches are uncontainable. Since that October, after hearing Siddiki in 2009, God enabled us to reduce our mortgage by 100,000. Today, February 25, 2011. I hold in my hand a certified check paying the final 32,000 of our mortgage.

God showed us favor in every area and even allowed me to close my businesses stay at home with our children. So only by the grace and sovereign hand of God we can say the "Death-Grip" has been released.

-a servant's heart

Disclaimer. A servant's utterance is copyright protected (c) 2011 a servant's heart and the information contained expresses personal views and values of a servant’s heart. The passage in its entirely may be forwarded or linked without consequence however, for any non-personal excerpt for print or publication should request consent from a servant's heart prior to use.